I will be deleting my blog...

I hope with my blogging @ dairresistible.blogspot.com someone learned something or found it entertaining enough for a read. You are give a week to take whatever in this blog and treasure it. Because, as of 1st of June 2010 I will be deleting my blog...

Strength of my self-discipline

I am not whining or complaining, more of like while trying out IBM Lotus Symphony I have suddenly got some vested interest in sharing my feelings to make a connection with you. In short, I am utterly dissatisfied. I guess we all are at times, it is in our nature. Humans! Some times it is like you hate the entire world, just want to be alone, leave me alone! Feels like the bars of this cage called life are toughening and rising higher beyond the clouds. The heart speeds up, with frightening thoughts and the forehead gets the sweat. Well, these are the signs that indicate that I am in the wrong place. More like the right time to get a one way ticket out for an escape.

What might have triggered such a state? Perhaps a chance encounter with someone I have been wishing to fall out of love, the nature have facts to prove that wishes are only for the wussies, and in the end never come true anyway. The animal inside wants to come out with unspoken torments and frustrations! Should I let it? Luckily I have matured enough not to act on my impulses.

Love you say, yes, sure I am. Well, who would not want romance in their life. But in love, you take so much time and effort to build a feeble stick house, which can be so easily blown away with the wind of change, or what if you stepped on it, accidentally or just out of ill judgment? So right now, I am not in the mood to tackle any setbacks in the romance department, too much responsibilities. In the matters of the heart, if I play, I play to win and games bring no joy! So it is time to do whatever it takes to brush off this nostalgia. For an ultimate joy, it requires a lot of sparks, but the problem is I have no time for sparks, not now...

So this is time for a change, is love in the air? Yes! But lets say change is in the air sounds better! This is more like a time to transform my heart, mind and my world. A gigantic leap forward. Time to take back the life of sugary sweet, frivolous, not that much sincere but enjoyable. The goal is aimed at a lazy finale, but for the finale I have got some heavy lifting to do, putting all this together requires an unchallengeable discipline. In short, coolness where romance is concerned. To make all these real, a decision has to be made. So I decide, I want freedom, and presto a rising tide of a very positive love vibration, as well as attunement to everything that is elegant, refined, beautiful, stylish and valuable. On a side note interest in antiques and collectibles, shopping and home decoration. I can't win if I don't play. Anything is possible for I know my passion, my potential and the strength of my self-discipline.

I am forced to be focused and mentally-clear...

Most of the time when working in a team, hoping for things to be done smooth and easily turn out to be a big disappointment. It is frustrating but being pushy, willful and to project the anger onto well-meaning teammates and friends is taboo. When things mushroom like this, there is no time for fun, for I am forced to be focused and mentally-clear...

New Inspirations!

Yesterday's luster is all gone and troubling vibes are neutralized. Lesson learned, opportunities are many but there are not that many days when I want an incited face to greet me in the morning. I am in a mood for adventure, this urge to explore the worlds is undeniable. However I am tired of the routine Male', perhaps need to hide away in an island filled with strangers and do a little bird-watching! Maybe some water sports and soulful walk by the beach front for new inspirations.

I love myself...

I think I am bald, haven't seen it or notice it until a friend would comment about it. I return the question, "sexy huh!" For I recall no history of when it all started, but for all I know baldness has nothing to do on my attractiveness or sexual virility. Like some friends, I could force myself to shave but the oh so perfect sterilized look doesn't appeal me much! Is this something to do with age? Well, anytime when someone ask, I have to calculate my age, so age is not an anxiety here...

In lieu of understanding, I will just say "who cares!" On the other hand I could bitch and moan about it! What for? I appreciate who I am and what I have, for I love myself...

Two questions to ask yourself about your boyfriend!

Girls, this may sound weired, but believe me on my age old experience. :) This two questions can make or break your relationship for an ever ending whatever you want. Don't get me here? Well, the most difficult part is not asking these two questions but rather the answers and more importantly what you want the answers to be! I stress the word 'you' here! So if you have followed this far into this blog post I am sure you must be really curious to know what those two questions are? Well, they are, is your boyfriend spiritual? And is your boyfriend creative? Simple! Note as I have mentioned before, first and foremost you have to find the type you prefer, some may like spiritual and some may not like it, that is ok. By the way by spiritual I don't mean religious! At the same time some may like creativity while for others it may be a nuisance. So know what you like first and next ask the two questions to yourself. In reality what only matters is your perceptions of who your boy friend is, not what others think or he think. Wish you all an enlightening morning with these two questions to ask yourself about your boy friend.

All that is important is doing the right thing!

Every dream, every big dream pass through three stages. Just like a farmer who plant a seed expecting the fruit of the labor. First it is the wanting of the fruit. Next planting the seeds, watering, attention to details and taking care. Last watch them grow slowly and steadily until it is time to pick the fruit. How one want to satisfy beyond this is both objective and subjective, but every dream has to pass through these three stages.

In the real life first comes the vision, the imagination and the idea. Than comes the plans to realize the dream to a realistic way forward based on set goals. Next it is the time to act and here one needs a lot of patience. Patience does not mean doing nothing, but more of like playing along with the nature.

One such dream is in motion, something dear to my heart, important and personal. Call me a dreamer, a loner, crazy or creative or even spiritual, suit yourself for I don't care. Listening to my inner voice I know the dream is awakeing from it's slumber. Yes, I dare to dream, for I dream with my eyes open. At times I feel the "loneliness", but all that is important is doing the right thing.

This shall pass too, for I am only human.

Feeling a lot of frustrations, but I have no reason to! Everything is moving as planned, everything is worth saying great, but why this annoying feeling! What is that I am missing? I am trying hard not to channel this frustration on others, for one day I might have to say sorry...

I know I am not ready to present her the hot bath tub... I can get things done easily by manipulation or deceit, but history have proved that the gain is not worth it, and I have never enjoyed anything unless it was mutually desired...

This is more like time to relax, for a while. There is nothing more to do, lists and promises are boring. This shall pass too, for I am only human.

Build my character to a new level

Well, I never expect things to be easy and everyone informed how hard it would be. Handling pressure and controlled chaos is not a problem. However, I never expected this many disguised opponents from all directions. Everyone playing nice and friendly. Well, it looks like this journey after all is going to be well worth to build my character to a new level.

I know we are going to be together for a while

The year started off with too much to handle, projects to work, nothing so far can be titled as, 'Mission accomplished', the worst part is I am forced to move on to brand new projects one after the another without completing the previous one satisfactorily. Being a perfectionist by nature, this is driving me insane...

Delegating and distributing my work and responsibilities that I love to do and entrusting others to complete and take care of them is rather difficult, but I know I am left with no choice and this is the only way to move forward.

My creative mind is wandering somewhere else, some where far away and twenty four hours per day seems not enough time to get everything on my plate done.

On top of all, I am tight down with a new personality that is a bit too pushy for my liking. Well, I am in the middle of something big, so I guess I better learn to handle this individual now, for I know we are going to be together for a while.

I love you all by heart and promise to stay loyal

I definitely wasn't expecting to fall in love now - not this fast and again, especially when I already have three wives. However, I am in love again for the fourth time, now I have decided and affirmed myself to marry and stay loyal until the trill last and the pleasure is worth it.

This burden on me is huge, the pressure is immense, this is the limit but lets not have any misgivings, accept the reality - repeat, accept, accept, accept - you that little voice in my head, back off! For all my wives, Maldicore, Ligo, MOSS & MBD, I love you all by heart and promise to stay loyal.

When romance is at home, the end is sweet

So far romance has been as of a romantic comedy! At times endless witty and challenging conversations like a ping-pong game. Can't help but display my cheeky side, for anyone who do live up to it excites me. In the mist of all these there are happy moments worth treasuring. More importantly there are those jolly movements worth laughing at own self. Whatever is the case, when romance is at home, the end is sweet.

As long as I love it, why apologize...

I love duties and responsibilities as long as they have a sense of belonging, something to say it is mine. Specially when I am a part of something huge, mountain big. At times the to do list do weigh me down but I love this nervous energy, I like to feed on it... So today, let me stop and count the number of hours I have slept in the past five days! Well, it came up to be, ten! Who cares, as long as I love it, why apologize...